I’m really advancing on this index. I’m actually proud of what I’ve accomplished so far. Feels good to stop procrastinating!

I’ll have to remember this feeling for in the future….

I’m glassesless right now. Something has been eating away at some special coating on my glasses. Because I use very little to no hair product, they don’t know what it is. They figure it’s just defective. Thankfully, it’s been less than a year since I purchased them, so they’re covered under warranty.

The bad thing is they have to send them out. And due to the holiday, it might take longer than the 7-10 business days they usually quote customers.

And we can’t find my old glasses. The hubby has turned the condo upside-down, and we can’t find them anywhere.

Which means I have to wear my contacts, which are the wrong prescription. And not bifocal. I’m starting to get used to them again, but I feel sick sometimes. I use “cheater” reading glasses for anything close-up.

I’m thinking I need a sexy glasses string for around my neck. Whatdaya think?

If I’m a little bit cranky for the next 7-10+ business days, blame it on the eyes.

I avoid getting any real work done. I think it’s the immature, procrastinating college student in me, and I fight with her constantly. She continually wins.

I finally sit down to get this index underway and guess what? I love every minute of it. What is wrong with me?

I do love my work. I truly do. Getting my teeth into a good manuscript, helping a writer to get to the bottom of an issue they have, or just helping an author outline their next book or paper–it’s all so rewarding. I even love the nitty-gritty, proofreading and fact-checking.

Maybe it’s because there is an immediate gratification from working on a manuscript. I can change that sentence so it makes sense, and voila! it’s done right there on the page.

Or perhaps it’s the happiness that an author exudes when, with only a little of my help (I’m no miracle-worker or expert, mind you), they can finally overcome that block that has been stopping them from writing their next chapter.

Or just helping an author get the finishing touches to their book done, so they can get another 100 printed off (one of my clients self-publishes) for Christmas presents.

Why do I fight this love? Is it all the distractions in my house, all the things that need to get done, unpacked, or thought about? When I worked in an office away from home, I am so productive. Though I know I can only work for about five hours total in a day (my eyes and head start to hurt, and then I’m not getting a damn thing done), in those five hours I can accomplish an index, a proofread, and several photo wishlists.

I don’t know what it is (or if it is all of the above), but I want it to stop. I think it’s just a matter of my growing up. It’s hard to say because I always (probably oftentimes incorrectly) prided myself in being such a grown-up, so mature. I think this is one part of my life I need to work on. For my sake and for the sake of my freelance career. Or maybe I should just get a staff job. That would do the trick, eh? We’ll see.

Backing Down

I am forbidden from directly working on my project proposal until after the holidays are up. Ann told me that I’m going to burn out soon, and we don’t need me throwing my laptop over the ledge here in my living area. Not good. So I’m backing off of it, but it’s going to get done soon after the New Year. I swear it.

I’m thinking of making a move to WordPress. I really like my research blog, but I don’t post to it much because it would mean logging in to another account. Blech. Perhaps a move, finally, after what? four years? What y’all think? Do you like where your blog is? Any experiences I should know about?

They’re really concerned with safety on campus during the holidays, and I can understand that. I’m sitting in my office right now, and I don’t hear anything, which is strange considering this hallway is usually bustling. DPS (our security peoples) want us to check in whenever we are going to stay for a while in a building. I’ll do that once we get further into the holiday season, but I’m thinking it will be busier then. People are just reveling in the semester being over right now.

Boring, boring post, I know, but I’m always interested in how campuses handle safety issues over holiday breaks. Our campus is usually pretty dead because we’re 80% commuters. How does your campus handle it?

I just handed in the final draft of my master’s project proposal.

I think my brain is going to start eeking out of my ears.

Only one last project for her class….

It has been an amazing class, though. I’ve learned so much, though I can’t think of any of it right now because I.am.burned.out.

Hear that sizzling? That’s my brain.

I think I should go to bed now, eh?

My latest obsession…and current study music.

Methodology & Me

I am absolutely and completely frightened of the Methodology section of my project proposal. I’ve worked on it a little, but Ann says it needs to be really detailed. What if I’m not even sure what I’m going to do to get to answer my question? What if I’ve skipped over revising and adding to this section the whole revision process and now am stuck doing it because I’m done with everything else?

Yeah. It’s going to be a long night.

Fightin’ the ?

I feel like I’m fighting against my question–not working with it. I think I might have to change it to fit what I’m finding and am most interested in. I don’t want to give in, but I also don’t want to be fighting with myself the whole time. That would lead to a very long research process indeed.